(50) Reflect the Character of Christ - Gentleness & Patience

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with a heart of mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if someone happens to have a complaint against anyone else. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also forgive others.  (Colossians 3:12-13 NET)

But it can be difficult to keep your composure when people let you down, make costly mistakes, or just keep seeming to make a mess of their lives.  We can become discouraged very quickly.  And along with the discouragement often comes impatience, irritability, and a harsh, edginess in our interaction with them.

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with . . . gentleness or meekness. Gentleness.  Not our first reaction when we become annoyed and discouraged by the people around us.  That’s why Paul challenges to “put it on.”

Gentleness is staying calm when you feel like getting hot.  It is a consideration of others that leads to a willingness to compromise, make concessions and even suffer injury rather than inflict it.   Gentleness springs from a willingness to let go of your rights for the good of others.  The opposites of gentleness is being assertive, controlling, overbearing, pushy.

It is the humble heart which is also the meek; and which, as such, does not fight against God, and more or less struggle and contend with Him. This meekness, however, being first of all a meekness before God, is also such in the face of men, even of evil men, out of a sense that these, with the insults and injuries which they may inflict, are permitted and employed by God for the chastening and purifying of His elect. –  Kenneth Wuiest

We need to remember that God is really in control.  Really, He is.  He could change our circumstances, even as it relates to the actions of people around us.  If He chooses not to, we need to let go, and not try to take His place, assert our authority, become overbearing and pushy and make the change ourselves. When we take it upon ourselves to change everyone around us and get people to think like us and do as we do, we assume the place of God and we will be plagued by irritation and discouragement.  We will be far less prone to discouragement with others when we learn to let go, stop trying to be God in their lives, stop sweating the small stuff, and stop trying to get people to be and do like us.

Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with . . . patience.  Because who doesn’t need patience in dealing with sinful, fallen humanity?  All of us do because we are quick to accept our weakness and failures but very quick to become impatient with others.

Peter T. O’Brien explains that patience carries the idea of longsuffering which endures wrong and puts up with the exasperating conduct of others rather than flying into a rage or desiring vengeance.  When you want it to happen NOW or you want them to change NOW you will face discouragement OFTEN.  In order to have victory over discouragement with others, we need to have an attitude of patience with the mistakes and failures of others, willing to stick with them as they change, grow, and improve.

Sometimes we just need to take a deep breath, close our eyes, and picture the times when we didn’t have it all together (as though we do now!).  Maybe we have achieved a measure of proficiency, stability, accomplishment and sound wisdom, but we weren’t always this way.  And someone at sometime surely had to be patient with us.

Gentleness and patience are founded on humility and built on submission to the sovereign working of God.  You’re not God.  You’re not perfect.  Remind yourself of these two important truths and you will go a long way to gaining victory over discouragement with others.

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Next: (51) Respond with the Conduct of Christ - Forbearance